In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful.
BEING THE FFIFTH SERMON FOR THE MONTH OF RABI’UL AKHIR, DATED RABI’UL AKHIR 30TH, 1444 AH (25TH NOVEMBER, 2022 CE).
TITLED: GOOD INTER-PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP AMONG PEOPLE
All Praises belong to Allah, the Lord of the worlds, and may the blessings and peace of Allah be upon His faithful Messenger, his good household, his sincere companions, and those who followed them until the Day of Judgment.
Thereafter… Fear Allah, o servants of Allah. Allah Ta’alah says: (ياايها الذين امنوا ان تتقوا الله يجعل لكم فرقانا ويكفر عنكم سيئاتكم ويغفر لكم والله ذو الفضل العظيم) “O you who believe! If you obey and fear Allah, He will grant you Furqan, a criterion [(to judge between right and wrong), or (Makhraj, i.e. making a way for you to get out from every difficulty)], and will expiate for you your sins, and forgive you, and Allah is the Owner of the Great Bounty.” (Al- Anfaal: 29)
O people! In this world, a person lives with others, and it is not possible for him to live alone, isolated from people, cut off from them. And as it was said, a person is not called a human being except because he associates with others, and he is associated with.
This is a clear factual thing, but not everyone adjusts properly to co-existing and companionship, and you may not find more than one in a hundred people, and they are becoming rarer and smaller as time goes on. As Bukhari narrated in his saheeh from the hadith of Abdullah ibn Umar, he said, the messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “People are like a hundred camels, and you almost are not able to find one suitable for a journey.” Al-Qaadi (Iyaad) said: the meaning is that you will struggle to find a camel among a hundred that could be mounted for a journey, gentle and easy to lead. So it is you find among a hundred people someone who is suitable for companionship, that helps his companion and is king and lenient to him.”
O brothers in faith! In reality, it is difficult for a person to have a companion of perfect character, for there must be a fault in every person, but people vary, so some would have a few and some would have many, and the best of companions is he who has the ability to relate with his companion in the best way.
O Muslims! The Muslim is required to relate well in everything, starting with his relationship with Allah – Glory be to Him – in performing his acts of worship. Allah Ta’lah says: (وَأَحْسِنُوَاْ إِنَّ اللّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُحْسِنِينَ) “…and do good. Truly, Allah loves Al-Muhsinun (the good-doers).” (Al-Baqarah: 195).
Being kind to others is a mean of entering Paradise, as Muslim collected in his saheeh that he prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “A man from among those who were before you was called to account (by Allah on the Day of Judgment). No good deeds were found in his record except that he, being a rich man, used to enter into transactions with people and used to command his servants to show leniency towards those who were insolvent. Allah, the Exalted, said: ‘We are more entitled to this (leniency) than him. Pardon him.”
And good dealing with others is a means of attaining Allah’s Mercy. Bukhari collected in his Saheeh from the hadith of Jaabir (may Allah be pleased with him), that the prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “May Allah have mercy on a man who is lenient when he sells, when he buys, and when he asks repayment from his debtor.”
Indeed, good relationship with others benefits the person, even if it is small and reduced in the eyes of people, while in the sight of Allah it has a great position. Muslim also collected from the hadith of Abu Dharr that he, (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Do not despise anything of what is good, even meeting your brother with a cheerful face.” And Abu Hurrairah narrated that prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: : “Whoever gives respite to an insolvent person or remits a part of his debt, Allah will shade him on the Day of Judgment in the shade of His Throne, on a day when there will be no shade but His.”
O believers! The first thing that a person is commanded to do in terms of good dealing after Allah is to relate well with his parents, and that is by being kind to them, and Allah has put alongside His Rights with their rights in more than one place: (وَقَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلاَّ تَعْبُدُواْ إِلاَّ إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا) “And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents…” (Al-Israa: 23), and (وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ إِحْسَانًا) “And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind to his parents.” (Al-Ahqaaf: 15).
Bukhari and Muslim collected the hadith of Abu Hurairah that he said: A man came to the prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and he said: Who among the people is most deserving of my good companionship? He said, “Your mother.” He said, “Then who?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: Then who? He said: “Your mother.” He said: Then who? He said: “Your father”.
And after the parents, the family, the spouses and dependents. Tirmidhi collected in his Jaami’ from the hadith of Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, that the prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “The best of you is the best to his family, and I am the best of you to my family.”
Al-Manawi said: “And he was the best in companionship to them, such that he would send the daughters of the Ansaar to Aisha to play with her, and if she wanted something that had no encumbrance, he would oblige her, and if she drank, he drank from the place of her mouth and kissed her while he was fasting. He made her watch the Abyssinians while they were playing in the mosque while she was leaning on his shoulder. And he raced with her in twice, and she was ahead of him once and he was ahead of her the other and then he said: “This one (race that I won) was for that other (race that you won).” It is in the Sahih that his wives used to review the hadith with him, and one of them went away from him one day until the night, and he and Aisha exchanged words (one time) until Abubakr came between them as an arbiter, as in the hadith collected by Tabarani.
Bukhari and Muslim reported that the prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “I advise you to treat women kindly, for the woman was created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is its uppermost part. If you try to straighten it, you will break it; and if you leave it, it will remain crooked. So, treat women kindly.”
Muslim collected in his Saheeh from the hadith of Abu Hurairah, may Allah be pleased with him, that the prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Let not a believing man hate a believing woman. If he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.” or he said: “another person will be.” The Prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) recommended being good to women, even when he was in the throes of death. So let them fear Allah, people who oppress their wives and women, and let them fear Allah, people who leave guardianship to the wife, and then they led the house to the abyss, and that is unjust to her for letting her to lead the home., Then after that is the family members and the children, then co-workers that work with you. Muslim collected in his saheeh the hadith of Ibn Mas’uud, he said, the prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “When the servant of anyone of you brings his food, let him make him sit down with him or give him some of it, for he is the one who put up with its heat and smoke.”
Then the neighbors. Ibn Abi Shaybah collected the hadith of Abu Hurairah – may Allah be pleased with him – he said: It was said to the Prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): So-and-so fasts during the day, prays at night, but se harms her neighbors with her tongue? He said: “There is no good in her, she will be in the Fire.” It was said: So-and-so prays the obligatory prayers, fasts Ramadan, gives alms from sheep’s milk, and does not harm anyone with her tongue? He said: “She will be in Jannah.” And Bukhari and Muslim collected the hadith of Abdullah ibn Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Jibril kept advising me about the neighbor until I thought that I would have to bequeath to him.”
O people! Nothing is heavier in the sight of Allah on the scale on the Day of Resurrection than good manners. Imaam Ahmad and Abu Daawud collected the hadith of Abu Dardaa, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “There is nothing in the scale heavier than good manners.”
Gathering of Muslims! The Prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was a example or an evidence for those who wanted good relationship with others, and that is why Allah praised him in his book, and said:
وَإِنَّكَ لَعَلى خُلُقٍ عَظِيمٍ
“And you, indeed, are of great moral character” (Al-Qalam: 4). And He, Glorified He is says:
(فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِّنَ اللّهِ لِنتَ لَهُمْ وَلَوْ كُنتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ لاَنفَضُّواْ مِنْ حَوْلِكَ فَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَشَاوِرْهُمْ فِي الأَمْرِ فَإِذَا عَزَمْتَ فَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللّهِ إِنَّ اللّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَوَكِّلِينَ)
“And by the Mercy of Allah, you dealt with them gently. And had you been severe and harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you; so pass over (their faults), and ask (Allah’s) Forgiveness for them; and consult them in the affairs. Then when you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him).” (Aal-Imraan: 159).
The second sermon
All Praise is due to Allah alone, and prayers of blessings and peace be upon the one after whom there is no other prophet.
We are continuing the same topic, thus, dear servants of Allah, be informed that good characters and manner of relating with people form part of the greatest things that guarantee Paradise for people on the Day of Resurrection. Thus, Allah made the Prophet, peace be upon him, a good example and says about him: (وانك لعلي خلق عظيم) ““And you, indeed, are of great moral character”
Whoever reads the biography of the Prophet – may Allah’s blessings and peace be upon him – will benefit a lot concerning how to relate with people, and win their love, and for this reason people enter Allah’s religion in droves. As related by Al-Bukhari from the hadith of Abu Hurairah: Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A man demanded of the Prophet (ﷺ) for repayment of a loan and was harsh to him. His Companions were about to attack him, but he (ﷺ) said, “Leave him, as the creditor is entitled to make a demand. Give him a camel of the same age as the camel that is due to him.” They said: “We find a better camel senior to it in age.” He (ﷺ) said, “Then buy it and give it to him; verily the best of you is the one who is the best in discharging his obligations (repayment of loans).”
Also Muslim related in his Sahih from the hadith of Aisha: ‘A’isha reported that Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) never beat anyone with his hand, neither a woman nor a servant, but only, in the case when he had been fighting in the cause of Allah and he never took revenge for anything unless the things made inviolable by Allah were made violable; he then took revenge for Allah, the Exalted and Glorious.
Al-Bukhari and Muslim narrated from the hadith of Anas bin Malik that he said: While I was going along with Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) who was wearing a Najrani Burd (sheet) with a thick border, a bedouin overtook the Prophet (ﷺ) and pulled his Rida’ (sheet) forcibly. I looked at the side of the shoulder of the Prophet (ﷺ) and noticed that the edge of the Rida’ had left a mark on it because of the violence of his pull. The bedouin said, “O Muhammad! Order for me some of Allah’s property which you have.” The Prophet (ﷺ) turned towards him, (smiled) and ordered that he be given something.
Al-Bukhari related in his Sahih from the Hadith of Abdullah Ibn Mas’ud (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: After the battle of Hunain, Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) favoured some people in the distribution of spoils (for consolation). He gave Al-Aqra’ bin Habis and ‘Uyainah bin Hisn a hundred camels each and showed favour also to some more honourable persons among the Arabs. Someone said: “This division is not based on justice and it was not intended to win the Pleasure of Allah.” I said to myself: “By Allah! I will inform Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) of this.” I went to him and informed him. His face became red and he said, “Who will do justice if Allah and His Messenger do not?” Then he said, “May Allah have mercy on (Prophet) Musa (Moses); he was caused more distress than this but he remained patient.”.
And the (old) woman used to take the hand of the Prophet – may Allah’s blessings and peace be upon him – in the streets of Madinah, and he would satisfy her needs, and he used to joke with the old and the young with kindness, and he only said the truth.
Al-Bukhari and Muslim related from the hadith of Anas bn Malik, the wordings are of Muslim;s account thus: “The Prophet (ﷺ) was the best of all the people in character. I had a brother called Abu `Umar, who, I think, had been newly weaned. Whenever he (that child) was brought to the Prophet (ﷺ) the Prophet (ﷺ) used to say, “O Abu `Umar! What did Al-Nughair (nightingale) (do)?” It was a nightingale with which he used to play. Sometimes the time of the Prayer became due while he (the Prophet) was in our house. He would order that the carpet underneath him be swept and sprayed with water, and then he would stand up (for the prayer) and we would line up behind him, and he would lead us in prayer.
O people: The Prophet – may Allah’s blessings and peace be upon him – was of a high degree of morality and good dealings, to the extent that the young loved him before the old, and the enemy before the friend, his dealings with people was balanced without excesses nor negligence. Rather, he was jokingly, he mixed with people as much as possible, thus, he benefited them without being bored or boring them, or being embarrassed or embarrassing them, and on this path for he who desires comfort in this world must thread, for people do not possess any other thing than that.
According to the INTERNATIONAL DAY FOR THE ELIMINATION OF VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN, the Prophet, may Allah’s blessings and peace be upon him, recommended kindness towards women as he (peace be upon him) said: “Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:
Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Take my advice with regard to women: Act kindly towards women, for they were created from a rib, and the most crooked part of a rib is its uppermost. If you attempt to straighten it; you will break it, and if you leave it alone it will remain crooked; so act kindly toward women”.
We must live with them and treat them in a way that is best.
It was said that:
Do good to people, you enslave their hearts, oftentimes that a person is enslaved by kindness.
And if an abuser does wrong, then grant forgiveness and overlooking for his missteps.
And let us know that we will not help people with our money until we please them, but they can be satisfied with good manners from a true Muslim.