IN THE NAME OF ALLAH, THE MOST MERCIFUL, THE MOST COMPASSIONATE
THE SECOND SERMON FOR THE MONTH OF ṢAFAR,
DATED 21 ṢAFAR 1447 AH (15/ 8/ 2022 CE)
KINDNESS TO PARENTS AND THE CONSEQUENCES OF DISOBEYING THEM IN BOTH WORLDS
THE FIRST SERMON
All praise is due to Allah, Who made the teachings of the Islamic religion encourage honoring one’s parents as one of the deeds most beloved to Him, and Who coupled kindness to them with His Oneness, Glorified and Exalted be He. We praise Him, seek His help, ask His forgiveness, and repent to Him from every sin and misdeed committed against Him. Then, may prayers and peace be upon the best of His servants, the guide to the straight path, and upon his family and all his companions.
As to what follows,
Noble servants of Allah, fear your Lord, for through fearing Him you will attain His pleasure and be saved from His punishment in this world and the Hereafter.
“وَإِنْ مِنْكُمْ إِلَّا وَارِدُهَا كَانَ عَلَى رَبِّكَ حَتْمًا مَقْضِيًّا * ثُمَّ نُنَجِّي الَّذِينَ اتَّقَوْا وَنَذَرُ الظَّالِمِينَ فِيهَا جِثِيًّا”
“And there is none of you except he will come to it; this is upon your Lord an inevitability decreed. Then We will save those who feared Allah and leave the wrongdoers within it, on their knees.” (Maryam: 71–72)
Know that Islam, with its noble legislation, has urged noble manners and attached to their practice great reward and recompense. Among these morals to which Islam has given immense care, and to which it has called people to adhere firmly, is honoring one’s parents, for they are the cause of our existence, and without them, after Allah Almighty, we would be nothing mentioned.
This virtue has, unfortunately, become for many in our time a forgotten or secondary matter. Children no longer recognize the great favor of their parents nor their rights over them. Instead, we hear and see instances of ingratitude towards them, despite the numerous and repeated verses of the Noble Qur’an and the sayings of the Prophet ﷺ, which place the pleasure of parents directly after the pleasure of Allah Almighty, and consider kindness to them a virtue that follows immediately after faith in Him.
Allah Almighty said:
“وَاعْبُدُوا اللَّهَ وَلَا تُشْرِكُوا بِهِ شَيْئًا وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا”
“Worship Allah and associate nothing with Him, and to parents do good…” (An-Nisa’: 36)
And He, Glorified be His Majesty, said:
“قُلْ تَعَالَوْا أَتْلُ مَا حَرَّمَ رَبُّكُمْ عَلَيْكُمْ أَلَّا تُشْرِكُوا بِهِ شَيْئًا وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا”
“Say, ‘Come, I will recite what your Lord has prohibited to you. [He commands] that you not associate anything with Him, and to parents do good…’” (Al-An‘am: 151)
He also advised kindness to them, saying:
“وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حُسْنًا ۖ وَإِنْ جَاهَدَاكَ لِتُشْرِكَ بِي مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ فَلَا تُطِعْهُمَا…”
“And We have enjoined upon man goodness to parents. But if they strive to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them…” (Al-‘Ankabut: 8)
And: “وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ ۖ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ وَفِصَالُهُ فِي عَامَيْنِ ۖ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ ۖ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ”
“And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.” (Luqman: 14)
The Noble Qur’an continues to portray the elevated status of parents and to clarify the manner a Muslim should adopt in dealing with them—especially if one or both reach old age, weakness, and frailty. Allah the Exalted says:
“وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا ۚ إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِنْدَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُلْ لَهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُلْ لَهُمَا قَوْلًا كَرِيمًا * وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُلْ رَبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا”
“And your Lord has decreed that you worship not except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], ‘uff,’ and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, ‘My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small.” (Al-Isra’: 23–24)
The manifestation of dutifulness to parents appears in several aspects, including the following:
First: Acknowledging the status of one’s parents after the rights of Allah, such as appreciation and gratitude, as Allah says: “…أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ” “…Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.” (Luqman: 14), and recognizing the necessity of being kind to them as a divine command and obligation expressed in a form that requires compliance: “وَقَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا…” (“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents…” (Al-Isra’: 23).
Second: Never showing annoyance at anything you might see or smell from one or both of them that may be unpleasant to others. Instead, be patient with them and seek reward from Allah for doing so, just as they patiently cared for you in your childhood. Beware of showing boredom or irritation, whether in small or large matters.
Third: Never distress or upset them with words that rebuke or scold — neither by raising your voice nor by harshness — no matter what they may do that displeases you or provokes emotion. Allah says: “وَلَا تَقُلْ لَهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا…” (“…and do not say to them ‘uff,’ nor repel them…”), but rather treat them with generosity and humility in both speech and action, as in His saying: “…وَقُلْ لَهُمَا قَوْلًا كَرِيمًا” “…and speak to them with noble words.” (Al-Isra’: 23). Obey them in what they command — out of mercy and compassion for them — even if they are non-Muslims, so long as it is not disobedience to Allah, as He says: “…وَإِن جَاهَدَاكَ عَلَى أَنْ تُشْرِكَ بِي مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ فَلَا تُطِعْهُمَا وَصَاحِبْهُمَا فِي الدُّنْيَا مَعْرُوفًا” (“…But if they strive to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them, but accompany them in [this] world with kindness.” (Luqman: 15).
Fourth: Address them with kind, gentle words coupled with respect and honor, following the best manners and noble character, such as saying: “O my father!” or “O my mother!”, and do not call them by their first names. Do not raise your voice in their presence, nor stare at them sharply; rather, let your gaze toward them be one of gentleness, compassion, and humility, as Allah says: “…وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ…” “…and lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy…” (Al-Isra’: 24).
Fifth: Pray to Allah to have mercy upon them with His vast mercy, as a reward for their mercy and compassion toward you, sacrificing their own comfort for your well-being in body and soul. Your supplication for them is among the ongoing benefits that reach them after their death, as the Prophet ﷺ said: “When the son of Adam dies, his deeds are cut off except for three: ongoing charity, knowledge that is benefited from, or a righteous child who prays for him.” (Narrated by Muslim).
O noble listeners, know, may Allah have mercy on you, that dutifulness to parents is among the most beloved deeds to Allah. ʿAbdullah ibn Masʿud (may Allah be pleased with him) asked the Messenger of Allah ﷺ: “Which deed is most beloved to Allah?” He replied: “Prayer at its proper time.” I said: “Then what?” He said: “Dutifulness to parents.” I said: “Then what?” He said: “Jihad in the way of Allah.” It is also a cause of long life and increased provision, as in the narration of Salman (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “Nothing repels divine decree except supplication, and nothing increases life span except dutifulness (to parents).” He also said: “Whoever would like his lifespan to be extended and his provision to be increased, let him be dutiful to his parents and maintain family ties.” (Agreed upon).
The opposite, O servants of Allah, is ʿuquq (disobedience /disobedience to parents). It is any action or speech from a child that causes harm to his or her parents, whether through neglect, raising one’s voice, or disobeying them in any form. This disobedience takes many shapes, such as making them cry or saddening them through words or actions, speaking harshly or rebuking them, raising one’s voice against them, showing annoyance at their requests, frowning in their presence, glaring at them with resentment, ordering them around, refusing to listen to them, insulting them, or criticizing them. In short, it is the opposite of birr (dutifulness). Scholars have given several definitions, among them Imam Ibn al-Ṣalaḥ (may Allah have mercy on him), who said: “Prohibited ʿuquq is any act that causes significant harm to a parent or the like, harm that is not minor, while it is not among the obligatory acts.”
Dear listeners! The punishments for disobedience to parents in both this world and the Hereafter have been mentioned in numerous ḥadiths. At the top of these punishments is deserving the curse of Allah for those who insult or curse their parents. Ibn ʿAbbas (may Allah be pleased with them) reported that the Prophet ﷺ said: “Cursed is the one who insults his father; cursed is the one who insults his father; cursed is the one who sacrifices for other than Allah…” In the narration of Ibn Ḥibban: “And Allah has cursed the one who insults his parents.” Among the worldly punishments is the saying of the Prophet ﷺ: “Two sins for which Allah hastens punishment in this world: oppression and disobedience to parents.” (al-Bukhari)
The undutiful person also opens for himself two gates to Hell. Ibn ʿAbbas (may Allah be pleased with them) reported that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “No Muslim who wakes up with his parents pleased with him will have less than two gates of Paradise opened for him; and if one of them is pleased, then one gate. And no Muslim who wakes up with his parents angry at him will have less than one gate of Hell opened for him; and if one of them is angry, then one gate.” (Abu Dawud and Aḥmad)
O noble listeners! Islam has strongly condemned disobedience to parents, reproaching those who forget their parents’ favors, and threatening those who deny their rights with deprivation in this life and the Hereafter. Among the related points are:
- The clear and decisive prohibition of disobedience to parents, as Allah says: “وَقَضى رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوالِدَيْنِ إِحْساناً إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُما أَوْ كِلاهُما فَلَا تَقُلْ لَهُما أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُما وَقُلْ لَهُما قَوْلاً كَرِيمًا” (“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them ‘uff,’ and do not repel them, but speak to them a noble word.” (Al-Isra’: 23).
- It is among the major sins committed by a servant of Allah, as the Prophet ﷺ said: “Shall I not inform you of the greatest of the major sins?” They said: “Yes, O Messenger of Allah.” He said: “Associating partners with Allah and disobedience to parents.”
- Its punishment is hastened in this world before the Hereafter, and the undutiful person is deprived of blessings in provision and lifespan altogether.
- The undutiful person is forbidden from entering Paradise, as the Prophet ﷺ said: “The undutiful to parents will not enter Paradise, nor the one who reminds others of his favors, nor the habitual wine drinker.” (Abu Dawud and al-Nasaʾi)
This is what we have learned from our Islamic heritage, which we must adhere to. It is not permissible to replace it with anything from other cultures that diminishes the status of parents or encourages their abandonment in old age and similar acts. This is our Shariʿah, and Allah Almighty has commanded us to follow it in His saying: “ثُمَّ جَعَلْناكَ عَلى شَرِيعَةٍ مِنَ الْأَمْرِ فَاتَّبِعْها وَلا تَتَّبِعْ أَهْواءَ الَّذِينَ لَا يَعْلَمُونَ (18) إِنَّهُمْ لَنْ يُغْنُوا عَنكَ مِنَ اللَّهِ شَيْئًا وَإِنَّ الظَّالِمِينَ بَعْضُهُمْ أَوْلِيَاءُ بَعْضٍ وَاللَّهُ وَلِيُّ الْمُتَّقِينَ” (“Then We put you upon a law of the matter; so follow it and do not follow the inclinations of those who do not know. Indeed, they will never avail you against Allah at all. And indeed, the wrongdoers are allies of one another; but Allah is the protector of the righteous.” (Al-Jathiyah: 18–19).
O Allah, we ask You to help us be dutiful to our parents, forgive us and them, O Most Forgiving, Most Merciful, and Most Compassionate of the compassionate.
THE SECOND SERMON
All praise is due to Allah, Lord of the worlds, Who says in His decisive revelation: “وَلَنْ تَرْضَى عَنكَ الْيَهُودُ وَلَا النَّصَارَى حَتَّى تَتَّبِعَ مِلَّتَهُمْ ۗ قُلْ إِنَّ هُدَى اللَّهِ هُوَ الْهُدَى ۗ وَلَئِنِ اتَّبَعْتَ أَهْوَاءَهُم بَعْدَ الَّذِي جَاءَكَ مِنَ الْعِلْمِ مَا لَكَ مِنَ اللَّهِ مِن وَلِيٍّ وَلَا نَصِيرٍ”
(“And never will the Jews or the Christians approve of you until you follow their religion. Say, ‘Indeed, the guidance of Allah is the [only] guidance.’ If you were to follow their desires after what has come to you of knowledge, you would have against Allah no protector or helper.” (Al-Baqarah: 120)
And He, the Most High, says: “هَٰأَنتُمْ أُولَاءِ تُحِبُّونَهُمْ وَلَا يُحِبُّونَكُمْ…”
“Here you are loving them, but they do not love you…” (Al ʿImran: 119)
Dear respected listeners,
Perhaps many of you have heard through social media what the famous Nigerian pastor, Oyedepo (Pastor Oyedepo), founder of a church in Nigeria, said during one of his church gatherings. Responding to requests from Muslims to allow Muslim female students in his university to wear the hijab, he rejected it outright, saying:
“…we have never shown the world the other side of God… the Lord who is a consuming fire… Let’s show them the consuming fire of God.”
And yet, he accuses others of terrorism! The shame is not his alone, but also on those in authority who support his institutions at the expense of Islamic schools.
O brothers in faith, the meaning of his statement is clear: any Muslim student who wishes to study in his school must be prepared to face torment at their hands, out of envy and hostility toward the symbols of his Islamic faith.
O servants of Allah, in our time, there have appeared callers to fitnah who insult the Companions and slander them, spreading the false beliefs of the Shiʿah which contradict the Book of Allah, the Sunnah of His Messenger ﷺ, and the consensus of the early generations of this Ummah. Among them are those who hide behind the guise of scholarship and fame, calling people to this corrupt creed. Beware of them and their ideology, no matter their position, and do not grant them access to manipulate the minds of your children.
The Prophet ﷺ said: “Do not insult my Companions. For by the One in Whose Hand is my soul, if one of you were to spend the equivalent of Mount Uhud in gold, it would not reach the measure of one mudd (handful) of theirs, nor half of it.” (Agreed upon)
Insulting the Companions is one of the major sins and an attack on the religion of Islam itself, for they are the ones who conveyed the Qur’an and the Sunnah to us. Whoever slanders them has slandered the religion.
So be on guard against the beliefs of the Shiʿah, which are built on exaggeration regarding the family of the Prophet ﷺ and insulting the Companions. It is a false creed aimed at dividing the Ummah and corrupting its religion.
Dear servants of Allah, know that “Indeed, this knowledge is religion, so look carefully from whom you take your religion” (Imam Muhammad ibn Sirin). This is a clear warning when seeking knowledge, especially when that knowledge poses a threat to one’s religion, belittles it, or neglects its symbols, regardless of the field of study. We must take the establishment of schools and universities seriously and give due care to well-run educational institutions.
We continue to offer condolences to our Palestinian brothers and sisters for their ongoing bitter suffering at the hands of the Zionists, whose plans aim at gradually erasing the Palestinian people from their roots, coupled with the lukewarm stance of surrounding Arab leaders. The bloodshed continues, even against humanitarian workers and journalists, such as Anas Al-Sharif, a correspondent for Al Jazeera in Gaza, who was recently martyred in an Israeli airstrike, may Allah have mercy on him and all those who sacrificed their blood for the land of honor.
Allah the Almighty says: “وَلَا تَقُولُوا لِمَنْ يُقْتَلُ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ أَمْوَاتٌ بَلْ أَحْيَاءٌ وَلَكِنْ لَا تَشْعُرُونَ”
(“And do not say about those who are killed in the cause of Allah, ‘They are dead.’ Rather, they are alive, but you perceive [it] not.” (Al-Baqarah: 154)
O Allah, forgive them, grant them well-being, pardon them, heal their wounded, and do not hold us accountable for our shortcomings toward them.
Supplication:
O Allah, honor Islam and grant victory to the Muslims. Humiliate shirk and the polytheists. O Allah, we entrust to You Al-Masjid Al-Aqsa, the people of Jerusalem, and all of Palestine. Grant victory to our brothers in Palestine and bestow upon them triumph, honor, strength, and might. Heal their sick, accept their martyrs with Your mercy, O Most Merciful of the merciful. O Allah, grant victory to the Mujahideen stationed in Your cause in Palestine, a mighty and swift victory. Support the Palestinian resistance factions, keep their feet firm, grant them steadfastness, victory, and empowerment, as well as all the Muslims.
O Allah, return Palestine and Al-Masjid Al-Aqsa to us in the best manner. O Allah, nothing of our situation is hidden from You, and our weakness is evident before You, so grant us victory through Your help, forgive our sins, and conceal our faults, O Most Merciful of the merciful. Do not hold us accountable for what we have done.
O Allah, we ask You for safety, security, tranquility, and peace in our land and in the lands of the Muslims. O Allah, Ameen.
O Allah, forgive us and our parents — the living among them and the deceased – those who bore witness to Your oneness, to Your Messenger’s message, and died upon that. Forgive us and our brothers who preceded us in faith. Our Lord, grant us good in this world and good in the Hereafter, and protect us from the punishment of the Fire. And send Your peace and blessings upon Your servant and Messenger Muhammad, and upon his family and companions.